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Apr. 12th, 2009 @ 07:23 pm Re: Ssssomebody
Current Mood: annoyed
To the "anonymous" poster who wrote about "furry sickness": Let's go over some facts.

I am pastor of a wonderful church. Membership and attendance are both growing. The people here are good, kind, Christians who love God and their neighbors and have no tolerance for hatred nor heresy. We've seen a number of people come to a saving knowledge of Christ, which is the test of any ministry. If this church has not been approved and blessed by God, I'll eat my whiskers.

I am the owner of a radio station which is growing in popularity and currently features 119 independent artists. I am also a minor celebrity in the webcomics industry.

I am a straight-A student at the Art Institute of Pittsburgh Online who is looking at graduating with a perfect 4.0, perhaps even as valedictorian.

I have a ladyfriend with whom I have a loving relationship and zero fornication, unlike a few other people I could name. I don't make a lot of money, but I do honest work. I live in my own apartment where I take care of myself, doing my own shopping, cooking, cleaning, etc.

In January, I undertook the Otter Day Eve Endurance Challenge and won. I have hanging on my bedroom door a white scarf to prove that I am an overcomer.

In short, I see no evidence of any "furry disease".

As for the certain someone you say I turned my back on, no, I didn't. He turned his back on himself. He is living in an unhealthy, abusive situation where he cannot flourish and is unable to begin the work to which God has called him. You and I both know that we are not talking overprotective parents. We're talking illegal actions. He has said many times that he is going to move out of that situation. I afforded him every help I could. Every time, he balks. When he was going to come out here to live with me, YOU caused him to balk. For years I put up with listening to him complain about his situation for hours at a time while I put everything on hold to listen. Because he has made the decision to stay in an abusive home, that situation is now self-inflicted. We are still friends and we talk often, but sympathy is no longer there. I won't help a man who refuses to help himself.

Going back to the disease, you are the one who has a problem. You hate part of God's family without reason and you condone illegal abuse. Ssssomebody, you are the one with the disease, not me. To quote Kurrel the Raven, "If you need to put a wierdo down to feel bigger, you're a sad sort of person and sicker than Doug Winger."
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Oct. 16th, 2008 @ 09:33 pm (no subject)
Current Mood: accomplished
Dad and I had an unexpected project today. My sister's porch roof was so badly dilapidated that she was afraid it would fall on someone. Looking at it, I could see why. So Dad and I pulled the roof off, but once we were done, we were far too exhausted to tackle the framework. Maybe we can leave it up and put fiberglass on it.
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Oct. 3rd, 2008 @ 01:28 am Getting better
Current Mood: happy
Things have been... interesting. My life has taken a turn for the better. First and foremost, I have a ladyfriend. Not quite a girlfriend, but more than a buddy. I'm not sure I should mention her name, lest I embarrass her, but I will say that she's a very special tiger. When I see her. it's like I get filled with energy that keeps me going through the next day. She doesn't even have to DO anything. Just being there is enough to make me feel alive.

I have a new car. It's a black Intrepid. Yeah, we finally had to admit that the Neon was not going to get fixed, so we traded it for a stove and a dishwasher, then dad took me to buy the new car. Grandma loaned the money, on the condition that I keep the bird feeder outside her window filled. I'm calling my new car "The Black Pearl".

I have my job as the church custodian back again. I like being able to serve God and not having to deal with irate customers. It's also just the right amount of physical labor for my body to handle.

I'm in my second year at the art school, now, and I'm getting solid 100%'s. I passed my last class with about 108%. I'm disappointed. I know I could have done better.
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Sep. 11th, 2008 @ 09:33 pm It's a Christian!
Current Mood: bouncy
I led a friend to Jesus today! Joy!
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Aug. 16th, 2008 @ 09:16 pm Been a while, hasn't it?
Current Mood: cheerful
Current Music: One Little Star
Well, I finally got around to resetting my password. Things had been bad for a while. I was overworking myself and getting very little done. I had even dropped all my comics for lack of time. It was very depressing. I feel more encouraged now, thanks to some very supportive friends, such as Ann, Xyie and Cho. I plan to post here a little more often.
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Jul. 5th, 2006 @ 10:54 pm sigh
Current Mood: melancholy
wow, it's been a long time since I've posted anything.

I don't know if I'll be posting much in the future. One thing I have learned and which was re-impressed upon me today is that it's not a good idea to be perfectly open with anybody.
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Apr. 1st, 2006 @ 12:44 am difficulties
Current Mood: sad
Current Music: Everybody Hurts
It's darn hard getting in here when you can't remember passwords. You'll notice I haven't been in here in a while. Part of it is because I've been busy. Part is because of the password thing.

A lot has happened in the past few month. Pastor Von, the man who pastored Grace Baptist before my father, pased away. Pandora has broken up. Though I haven't had a temper since I stopped taking antidepressants, the attacks I got when I tried to nudge the other artists into doing something for the group or for charity... It was as if Pandora was a sweet little doggie that had suddenly gone rabbid. It was so exactly the polar opposite of what it was meant to be that I really didn't se any alternative but to tear it down and start over. So that's what I did.

Of course, almost nobody understood. I've been such a you-know-what in the past that everyone assumed I was having a tantrum. Martin would not talk to me for months. Of the over a dozen artists that were in the group, only Wallaroo has come back. (Excluding the members of Team Intense) Even Ellie has not updated House of Lost Dreams in ages.

It happened so many months ago, but it still hurts. It used to be such a pleasure to serve the others by drawing all my comics and building up a large number of member comics to draw readers in. Now I get almost no joy at all from drawing my comics.

On the upside, I'm doing web-sonics, now. These are audio dramas rather like the old 50's and 60's radio shows. I'm doing one by myself called TF Help Desk. It's a TCW spin-off that runs about 6 minutes. The other one is a half-hour show about Otter Island. It's gotten BIG. Over a dozen cast and crew members, now. Among them: Wanderer, Jude the Rat, Kaninus, Ashenfox, Eala Dubh, Ann Vole, and now I've even got Phil Geusz and Jon Krupp on board. It's so awesome to hear the characters come to life, especially with full sound effects and background music. Kind of like the first time I saw my favorite pokemon in fully animated 3-D. (By the way, anyone who knows anything about Pokemon psychology, give me a ring. My Blastoise has got problems.)
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Dec. 21st, 2004 @ 02:20 am The kids
Current Mood: content
Current Music: Otter's Lullaby
Have I ever told you about my kids?
Well, they're not technically my kids. They are dear young friends who, during the time we got to know each other, needed an extra parent. So you could say I became their "Furry Godfather".

First there's Xan, the armadillo. His father lives in another state, so I'm the one who takes him to the zoo and teaches him other languages and attends his school plays, and I couldn't be happier with the arrangement.

Then there's Frost the tiger, who just needed someone who understands him. As a sci-fi writer, I can understand a lot of strange things, people included. We've spent countless hours talking about this and that and playing with the props from "The Changing Workplace". He's kind of outgrown me, though, which I understand. He's gotten to a place where he prefers to live seriously, and as one born to make people laugh, seriousness doesn't come easy.

Kyle the raccoon is a great kid. At least, I always see him as a kid. He's so young at heart I have to remind myself he's a teenager... until he tells me something profoundly wise. I think Kyle has been much more helpful to me these past years than I've been to him. He's the one I can always go to when I need a shoulder to cry on.

And then there's Martin. When we met, Martin was pretty much convinced that he was worthless and a disappointment to his family. I wish I could take credit for turning him around, but the thing that really did it was his decision to let Christ in and allow Him to change him from the inside. Now, He's gone from loser to champion, as he's studying to become a lawyer. I'm so proud! Of course, I know it's only a matter of time before he gets into his real passion- filmmaking! I know that boy can do anything.

And of course, you all know Amanda. She's not real. At least, not yet. Amanda is the embodiment of my hopes to have a child of my own. But even before she's come into this world, I love her so much that I can hardly wait. I just hope I've guessed correctly. I'll be really embarassed if she turns out to be a boy. I won't love him any less, naturally. I'll just have to do a lot of editing on the old comic strips.

I adore all my "children". We don't always see eye to eye on everything, but we love and we forgive, and that's what's important.

I don't know if I should mention him, but there is one more person. A wonderful young man by the name of CJ fur. He hasn't deigned to call me "furry godfather" yet, but well... CJ, if you're reading this, (and i know you will) I just want you to know that I care about you like I do one of my own boys. When you hurt, I hurt, and sometimes I just with I could be there to give you a great big hug and make everything better.
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Aug. 17th, 2004 @ 12:29 am Busy week
Current Mood: enthralled
Well... like the subject line says, it's a very busy week for me.
First of all, I made a major mistake with the comic syndicate which rendered one of our servers unusable. Now I'm paying for that mistake by moving sites from one server to another and going through and changing many of the internal links so that everything works again. As long as I'm dong that, I'm going to try to bugfix those awful TCW archives.
I had minor surgery today. Had a nasty, weird blemish on my shoulder that may have been cancerous, so I had it removed. I didn't realize until later that the arm which I must now refrain from moving to much until the wound heals up is the one I use my cane with.
Tomorrow I am going to get my first pair of glasses. I really need them. As I was lying there getting sewn up today, I was trying to read a sign that was about 4 feet from my face and couldn't. I was afraid there wouldn't be enough money for this eye exam, but Hallelujah, there was just enough.
Wednesday, I go in for a job interview at Wal-Mart. I hope I can get a job that is not physically strenuous.
I found some berries growing in my garden this weekend. They looked like blueberries, and I had sewn blueberries the previous summer, so I tried one. So did Mom. It tasted like a tomato. I found out later that the berries are nightshade. Not deadly nightshade, thank goodness, but black nightshade, which becomes safe once the berries are mature. Still a bit of a shock, though.
I'm giving German lessons to two of the kids who came along on the trip to the reservation. One of them is my nephew, Xan. Most of you know him. He's the big, pink armadillo in "Amanda". They're both very good, but Xan especially is a wiz. I am very proud of his progress.

As I thought about my last journal entry earlier today, it occurred to me that I might have sounded like I was whining about the home we were staying in. By no means. True, it was not comfortable, but that is not what is important. What IS important is that it's the one place which took us in.
That got me thinking. There was another very humble, uncomfortable place which took in some weary travelers. It was a stable in bethlehem. Just a stable. The hosts weren't even human. They were barn animals. Yet today, that stable has become sacred in the hearts of Christians. Not because it was luxurious or impressive or stately, but because it was the one place that made room for the Messiah. Herod lived in a palace at the time (I'm sure), yet how many people even remember it? Do you ever see someone erecting a replica of Herod's palace in their yard at Christmastime? How many people even speak Herod's name except with a tinge of contempt? Yet today, we make statues to commemorate the animals who shared their home with baby Jesus. The donkey who bore Mary on his back has received greater honor than most of the kings who ever reigned on the Earth put together, and rightly so.
So though I complain, I say to all the Sioux who have shown us kindness during our visit that you have done a wondrous thing in God's eyes, and in mine as well. Thank you, and may the Creator reward you richly.

Better go, now. All this typing has made my arm REALLY hurt. Good night, everyone, and as they say on the island, "Mungu yeetek u!"
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Aug. 3rd, 2004 @ 06:38 pm Mission trip
Current Mood: tired
Wow. What a weekend.
It was a five hour trip up to the reservation, but it seemed like much less. It was me in the van with all the clothing, with Xan riding with me, and in the other van, Pastor Larry, Alex Gerk and Cassie.
We arrived in the late afternoon and met with Fred and Gail Cedarface, the folks in charge of the Healthy Start program. They gave us each a calendar and a T-shirt. They and their kids (and godkids) were very nice. We unloaded all of the clothing from both vans onto a couple of pallattes, hung around a little more and went out to the Kicking Bear Waicipi (Powwow).
I spent about $5.00 on dinner before discovering that the food vendor there was not the official caterer. Had I waited, I would have gotten a much better dinner for free. Oh well.
I was struck by the fact that they used the American Flag to open their grand entry, and treated it so respectfully. The dancing was awesome. The last powwow I attended was one which had a spirit of protest, so the spirit of celebration in this one was a new experience, and it was enthralling. We ALL got out and danced. Larry even got to meet the tribe president.
After the powwow, we were escorted to our host's home, where we had a great deal of trouble getting to sleep. There was a smoke alarm with a low battery that we just couldn't seem to turn off. Alex, Cassie and Larry were so tired that they ignored it. Xan and I had to go sleep out in the vans.

Next day:
After waiting around 3 hours for everyone else to get up, we went and had breakfast at fuel station in Pine Ridge. After that, we went to see the cemetary at wounded knee. It was a revelation. I knew that the USA had done some nasty things in the past, but I had no idea it was capable of anything so heinous as the massacre of wounded knee. Even more disturbing, however, is the cycle of hate which continues as a result.
We met a local merchant who had set up a shaded arbor by the side of the road and unlike others, didn't charge other vendors to use it. This was refreshing to see. In the poorest county in the nation, many merchants tend to grab as much as they can. Things tend to cost 150% of the normal going rate elsewhere in the country. This lady didn't even have water in her house, and yet she was anything but greedy, even handing out discounts for big purchases. I like her. We then returned to the powwow site where our group was honored for our donations.
Now here's a rather strange occurrence. We all felt it necessary to drive out to the Singing Horse trading post, even though we knew that it would probably mean missing the grand entry. When we arrived there, we found something rather shocking. A young girl had just been beaten with a golf club by her uncle and had been carried over to the trading post with a concussion. We provided some ice to put on her injuries, then stood and prayed for her. The last we heard, she was physically all right, but incoherent.
After that, we felt the urge to go driving through the badlands. There, we found a woman whose car wouldn't start. Larry gave her a jump, but her car still wouldn't start. Not until he told her about the little girl who had been beaten and she said that she would pray for her.
After that, we returned to the powwow. We all danced again, and Xan even got a shawl and did a shawl dance. (This was specifically for men. They were all shawl dancing.)
We were all exhausted at the end of that day, and thank goodness, we found a way to turn the smoke alarm off!
The following morning, we left some gifts for our host, including household goods, toys, garden seeds, money, and a new battery for the smoke alarm. We headed out for Mt. Rushmore, where we spent the afternoon. I even took the presidential walk, which, let me tell you, is quite a feat for someone in my condition.
The ride home had an excited feel, but we were all very happy to get home.

Take a look at the Otter Island site if you'd like to see some of the drawings I did during the powwow. (in a couple of days.) I also wrote my own drum song. Xan and I are even thinking about starting our own drum team.

I'm anxious to go back next year. I just need to rest up a bit. I'm exhausted.
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Jul. 29th, 2004 @ 08:07 pm Mission trip
Current Mood: excited
Tomorrow morning, I'm leaving on a mission trip to the Lakota reservation.
I don't remember whether I've told the whole story, but here's how it came about.
For about a year, now, Larry Crooks, our youth pastor, has been organizing a clothing drive for the Lakota Sioux. For those who don't know, the Lakota live in the poorest county in the U.S., which has a nearly 100% unemployment rate.
Last Sunday, I was compelled to ask if I could go along. I didn't, though. It costs money to go on a missions trip, and I don't have it.
After the morning service, I was informed that the drive had amassed so much clothing that there was no way it was going to fit in one vehicle. A second driver would be needed, and I had three offers of sponsorship should I agree to be the driver. So at 7:30 tomorrow, I'll be leaving on a 5-hour drive to S. Dakota.
I'll let you know how it went when I get back.
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Jul. 28th, 2004 @ 01:47 pm Grrrrr
Current Mood: aggravated
Here's another story about how seriously messed up the US court system is.
Many of you know the story of Mr. Miller. He shoplifted several books from my store. I went to his house to ask him to pay for the books. This he did, but not until after he had been extremely verbally abusive and threatened my business. When he threatened me, I slapped his face. He took me to court. He won. Now I have to write a letter of apology to this odious thief and pay a $50 fine.

I AM sorry for what I did. I hated myself for getting violent, and I don't ever want to be in that place again. However, I REALLY dislike Miller and the thought of having to apologize makes my gorge rise. Then again, it is the Christian thing to do.

Sometimes doing the right thing is massively unpleasant.
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Jul. 21st, 2004 @ 10:39 pm My goals
Current Mood: hopeful
In 1998, I bought my first computer. It was the first time I was able to connect to the internet at will, and somehow I knew that this was going to be important. Not to be melodramatic, but I knew somehow that my destiny was going to be on the internet. So the other day, I was asking myself: What is it that I want to accomplish here. Well, here is what I came up with.

#1) Through Pandora / Ottercomics, to do the following:
By drawing comics, to spread laughter and joy while teaching moral values and points of wisdom.
To help other cartoonists to advance their carreers.
To raise up a family of cartoonists and ops who share my dream and are willing to help one another achieve their goals.

#2) To spread the gospel to those who have not heard it, and to build up my fellow Christians in their faith by providing opportunities for fellowship, study and good works they might not otherwise have had.

#3) To love those who are in need of love.

#4) To oppose evil wherever it has found a foothold in cyberspace.

#5) To let weirdos like me know that they're not alone.

Cool, huh?
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Jul. 21st, 2004 @ 08:42 pm (no subject)
Current Mood: rejected
Here's something I've been wondering for a long time. Why is it that in judaism, it's the men who wear yamulkes, but it the mennonite church, it's the women?

Well, I just heard from a friend that he has found himself a potential mate. I'm very happy for him. I can't help feeling jealous, though. Most of you who know me know that I have been involuntarily dateless for most of my life, and the two times that I thought I had found true love, my girlfriends turned on me rather viciously. One spread malicious lies about me and the other threw me out of her life without ever giving an explanation that made sense.

Times like this, I feel like Charlie Brown, standing next to the mailbox, watching everyone else get valentines but never getting one himself.
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Jul. 15th, 2004 @ 01:43 pm lost in the crowd
Current Mood: envious
It sure seems that there are a lot of otters today. Back about four year ago, I was the only one I knew of. It made me feel special and unique. Now there are many otters, and I am no longer unique in that respect. While I am very happy to meet others like me, it does make me feel a bit common.
Worse, though, is that I used to feel extra special about being a magician in the manner of Good Magician Humphrey. (I don't practice magic, but I know a darn lot about it.) But lately, I've seen otters who are half dragon, who are immortal, who can fly or have super speed or an ice ray... It leaves me feeling like last year's model. Yes, I could give myself extra powers, but it wouldn't be legit, as I'd only be doing it to compete.
oh well.
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Jul. 5th, 2004 @ 11:11 pm TF academy
Current Mood: creative
Well, I've been saying for a year that I'm going to do it, and now, I'm going to. I'm starting up the Transformation Academy. This is going to be an e-mail-based correspondance school which will offer a cirriculum of 18 single-lesson classes, all concerning transformation. Classes will begin this September. I just hope that I can get some students in that short a time. I've already got the proffessors.
To those who are wondering, no, it's not acreddited. This is just for fun.
I've just drawn up the cirriculum. I need to distribute it to the faculty, and then I'll have the website up. When I'll do, I'll put the URL up here for anyone who is interested.
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Jul. 3rd, 2004 @ 07:20 pm Some good news, some bad news
Current Mood: lonely
Good news about the tailaches. I've caught the attention of Dr. Ramachandran, the pioneer neurologist. Perhaps he can help me figure out why I suffer these pains and what to do about them.

The bad news is about Pandora, my comic syndicate. It's just been falling apart, and I don't know what to do. I've been trying to keep over a dozen series going to serve as a good example, but I just can't keep up with myself.
Worse yet, none of the webmasters whose help I have been able to elicit are able to keep up with me, either.
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Jul. 2nd, 2004 @ 03:02 pm hard work
Current Mood: accomplished
I'm still keeping at it. Though, as many of you know, my bookstore has closed, we're still selling online. Unfortunately, I'm having to rebuild the entire business from the ground up, since our inventory got totally mangled by a certain counter clerk who refused to keep records. It irks me that I'm having to re-do two years of work, but at least I've learned some valuable lessons from it.
It's not that my work is all that hard, it's just that there's so much of it to do. I've had to hire a volunteer to post my comics for me in order to make a little time, and even then, I'm not always able to get my comics to him on time. If you're reading, Caliroo, I promise to try to do better.
We've almost gotten everything moved out of the store. As a result, the house is a hopeless mess.
Would anybody like to offer suggestions for the store website? It's at www.otterbooks.biz .
Yes, it's the entire mall, and there's going to be a lot more, soon.
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Jul. 2nd, 2004 @ 12:12 am Tailaches
Current Mood: distressed
Phantom pains are... well... a pain.
These past few days, I've been suffering from monstrous pains in my tail.
How in the world do you fight pain when it comes from a limb that doesn't technically exist? Aspirin and tylenol don't seem to work very well.
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Jul. 1st, 2004 @ 11:41 pm searching
Current Mood: contemplative
How many of you out there know what an oblate is?
An oblate is kind of like a monk, except that they don't live in the monastery and they still have secular jobs.
That's what I am.
I am also a baptist.
To the best of my knowledge, there is no such thing as a baptist monastic order.
This puts me in a rather lonely position. I have no one to lean on for support, no one to hold me to my commitments... no one to lend any validation to the rites and items whose significance is meant to deepen one's relationship to God.
I have friends who are benedictines, and they have been very nice, and have helped me to understand the monastic lifestyle, but we really don't have a deep relationship, and because of differences in doctrine, we just can't connect intelectually.
So I am searching for other baptistics and protestants like me who want a deep relationship with God and might even want to create an order of our own.
I know you're out there, somewhere.
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